


dad i'd like to fuck

by starfleetbanana



Category: Star Trek: Alternate Original Series (Movies)
Genre: Crack, M/M, Sorry Not Sorry, the dilf fic
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-01-14
Updated: 2017-01-14
Packaged: 2018-09-17 09:38:37
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,273
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9316988
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/starfleetbanana/pseuds/starfleetbanana
Summary: One Leonard McCoy decides to tell his best friends he is, in fact, a father. Chaos ensues in Spock's brain. Also known as the dilf fic.





	

**Author's Note:**

> i've been meaning to finish this fic for almost six months. i got the idea from beyond, dont ask me how it just happened. im sorry, but also i am not. non betad bc who the fuck cares abt the dilf fic. dont @ me dont just dont

Despite the fact Spock and Leonard had built their friendship throughout years, endless metaphors and a lot of sass, it’d taken a lot of time for Spock to mention important things, such as the fact he knew there was an alternate universe where, according to Leonard, wild shit happened. But it had also taken a great amount of time for Leonard to mention he was a father.

Spock understood it was probably because he’d been emotionally unstable his first months as a CMO, insulting everyone around him and shouting at him simply because he was a Vulcan, except with the time he comprehended that was Leonard McCoy. According to the Captain, it seemed weird because Leonard didn’t __look like a dad__ , whatever that meant.

After his “secret” was out and Jim proceeded to question him on every possible detail of his life, Leonard kindly reminded him of all the times he’d mentioned ‘Joanna’d called him’ and they hadn’t listened because they were too lost in their science bullshit. Spock simply shrugged. Logic told him she was probably Leonard’s casual partner, or something that made sense to humans and it was completely fine if he didn’t want to introduce her to his friends, except now Jim knew Leonard had a little kid all he wanted to do was compare her to Bones.

The child, in fact, looked a lot like her dad which actually made him __look like a dad.__ She had blue eyes though, dark hair, and the sweetest smile without her front teeth. She was seven years old and lived on Earth with her mother, which made sense because if that sweet child had to live with her father for five years on a starship she’d probably end up as bitter as the doctor. He could imagine she’d make him happier, because as he’d mentioned she was his weakness.

“Another reason to keep her safe on Earth, doctor” Spock said, nodding to himself.

“Actually she’s on Earth to keep her from people like you two. She’s already too into science. Give her a lab and she won’t stop following you around, Spock” He answered with a proud smile on his face. Indeed, he looked like a dad.

“Fuck, Bones, I think knowing you’ve a child kinda makes you hot” Jim said looking a bit confused. The Captain always said such unnecessary things, he thought, but when Leonard laughed it hit him hard. He could see that thing he’d failed to notice on Leonard whenever he was shouting or frowning at him.

He tried to analyze his thoughts for a while. Leonard had been his friend for a while but as much as he’d always thought he was good looking, he had no control of his emotions and he was always talking too much. Plus, he was that kind of human that liked looking into people’s eyes and touching them so they’d know they were listening and most times Leonard seemed to forget he was way more sensitive to his touch than Jim. Spock didn’t exactly like him in a romantic way, but he appreciated his body from a scientific point of view. Yes, he was attractive, and yes, being a dad made him a little bit more attractive.

Then they were both formally introduced to Joanna McCoy who was indeed, a very kind and little girl who was very excited about meeting her dad’s friends. Spock felt something akin to joy in that moment, where little Joanna giggled at tried pronouncing  Spock’s full name for the third time and then proceeded to talk about how bad she wanted to be a science officer just like him. Joanna McCoy was a whole new person who was as intense as her dad was and that only made him think of Leonard McCoy talking to his daughter and freaking acting like a dad. It was... cute. Adorable, even. Hot, even.

“Well damn, daddy” The captain said one day as a way of greeting his friend. Spock felt like he was gonna blush for a second, but Jim was always like that, it wasn’t new, he had to keep his expression as stoic as always. What was new was McCoy’s smirk when he said hello to the both of them and Spock wasn’t sure he’d ever felt something like that in his life. He’d always tried to keep his emotions at bay, but there it was, Leonard McCoy, sitting on his desk looking like a nightmare and well, a dad. He couldn’t unsee it.  

Spock was in fucking trouble. He was distressed if he could say so and it was burning him alive with the kind of feverish longing he rarely ever felt. The kind of longing that made him want to take the turbolift to medbay and sit in Doctor McCoy’s office thinking of how much of a dad he looked, but he didn’t. Instead, he talked to his best friend who, however annoyingly human he was most the time, always managed to help him. Jim Kirk was a whole different thing to think about but that wasn’t making sharing the bridge with Doctor McCoy unbearable, in fact, it had nothing to do with the Captain. Still, he chose to ask for advice.

“Captain Kirk”

“Yes?” Jim answered with a cocked eyebrow at how uncomfortable Spock looked.

“Ever since it came to our knowledge that Doctor McCoy is in fact a father, my perceptions of him have changed and I’m not sure I know how to behave in front of him anymore” Jim shrugged and pretended to think of it.

“Do you mean... In a scientifical way or in another way?” Jim asked tentatively.

“Jim, I don’t think I would be asking you for any advice regarding science, may I remind you both of us are science officers?” Jim snorted, “It is, of course, in another way” Jim made a choking noise this time.

“Oh fuck no, are you telling me you wanna fuck Bones? I mean he is kind of a dilf but? Spock, confrontation is good. Just tell him whenever you feel ready, however robotic and weird it might sound, I fully support your advances” The Captain said, all bright eyes and already thinking of a plan to convince the one Leonard McCoy things would get interesting.

* * *

 

"Doctor McCoy" Spock said, entering Bones' office in quick strides, decided to make a confession. Vulcans weren't used to this kind of things, but he was going to do it whether he wanted or not.

"Yes, Mister Spock?" He asked nonchalantly. His smirk was making his knees quiver and Spock was not used to that kind of physical sensations, "Jim told me you'd come talk to me but I didn't expect you to be so quick"

"Doctor McCoy, it has come to my attention that you are a dad" Spock said, trying to get his words out calmly. Vulcans did not freak out, and he wasn't. He was trying to be as blunt as he always was, except Leonard's smile was suddenly too much.

"Yes, I am" 

"You are, according to Captain Kirk's words, a dad I'd like to fuck" Spock finished and Leonard McCoy stood up from his chair to stand in front of him. 

The silence stretched between them and Spock felt like his lips were a darker shade of green as Leonard inspected his face with the cockiest smile he'd ever seen. 

"Good to know, Mister Spock" He answered, taking Spock's hand in his as Spock struggled to swallow. 

And Doctor Leonard "Bones" McCoy knew how sensitive Vulcan's hands, but his grip was tight yet soothing. He was, in Captain Kirk's words, fucked.


End file.
